I do complain about them a lot and I should be more careful about that. In the grand scheme of things, I have great kids. They are (mostly) well behaved, kind, loving, and very smart.
I guess it is just hard to be grateful for such good kids when they still know how to push my buttons and I'm operating on very little sleep.
But I'm trying.
I'm trying really hard to be smitten with my children even when my almost-four year old refuses to nap and the heaps on the I'm-so-tired-I-can't-see-straight attitude.
I'm trying to enjoy my seven month old even when she screams like a banshee to be picked up every fourteen seconds while I'm trying to cook dinner. And when she pulls those fine little hairs on the back of my neck.
I'm trying to be thankful even when my 2 year old throws himself to the floor in protest when it is time to leave the train table at the book store.
My kids really are wonderful. They don't run too far down the path in front of me. They don't get into things they shouldn't *very often. They can (and do) play by themselves. They do as told in stressful situations. They roll with the punches when we run out of chocolate syrup. I have it pretty easy, really. And I know that.
Sometimes I need to blog it to remind myself how nice our little (big?) family really is!
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Friday, March 4, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Boy's Room: In Case You Were Wondering
We got the decals for the wall from Amazon. (Hat tip to our friend John for the Amazon gift card for Christmas! We also bought a new kitchen food scale to help us with our weight management. Thanks!)
They stick very well, even though our house has textured walls.
We bought the paint from Walmart for $7.99. I didn't even know walmart had their own line of paint, but they do! I read some reviews on it and, admittedly, it doesn't have the highest quality. It is manufactured under the ColorPlace label for Walmart by Sherwin Williams. Most reviews say that if you are willing to do a couple coats it will do just fine for you. We did 2 coats of the "Spring Garden" color.
I think I spent $18 total for the letters & brown paint for their names (and Lauren's initials for her room.)
So all in all, it was a pretty inexpensive way to jazz up the boys' space. We decided to go for it before we moved them together to try and make Ian feel excited about the move. New paint, wall decals, his name on the wall... all ways to show him he wasn't moving into Aaron's Room, but into a completely new room for both of them. Due to illnesses and baby-fussies, it ended up taking us a month to finish the project. I actually think that was really good, though, because it allowed the boys/all of us to get used to the changes gradually. We finished the painting over last weekend. The decals arrived yesterday (& I bought & painted the brown letters yesterday, too) so we pulled it all together before dinner last night with a big, exciting finish! Ian & Aaron helped move Ian's things (bed, dresser, books, etc.) over & it all went great!
They are both over the moon about the new space. For less than $50, I'd say that's a major win.
Friday, January 21, 2011
We made playdough
I used this recipe.
I let Ian & Aaron each have a sauce pot on the stove to which they added the ingredients we measured together.
Then I stirred them with the heat on until it was done.
I dumped it out onto parchment paper on the table and kneaded it until it was cool enough for the kids to handle.
And then they played and played.
For the record, I found the link for the playdough recipe at this awesome website.
Also for the record, I know we need to change our table cloth. And that we're still in our pajamas at 11am.
I let Ian & Aaron each have a sauce pot on the stove to which they added the ingredients we measured together.
Then I stirred them with the heat on until it was done.
I dumped it out onto parchment paper on the table and kneaded it until it was cool enough for the kids to handle.
And then they played and played.
For the record, I found the link for the playdough recipe at this awesome website.
Also for the record, I know we need to change our table cloth. And that we're still in our pajamas at 11am.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Last minute tips
A topic suggested by a friend. He & his wife just happen to be having their first baby in 6-ish weeks. Do I detect a little bit of freaking out? (I'm joking... or am I?)
So you're about to have a baby. What are my Last Minute Tips for you?
1. Don't worry about getting everything perfect.
I know you want to. I know you're making lists and lists and planning projects down to the last minute before you leave for the hospital. I did it too. The last 6 weeks before Ian's due date arrived, I spent every waking moment and a lot of the moments I should've been sleeping trying to get things perfect. I folded, refolded, organized, reorganized, cleaned, re-cleaned, paid bills ahead, packed my bag, repacked my bag, installed the car seat bases, put up the pack-n-play, assembled the swing, bouncer, exersaucer, laid out the diapers, bought 7 different kinds of creams and lotions, etc. I had it all ready. I was so ready that in the week after my due date I just sat around beached-whale style, twiddling my thumbs.
With Aaron, I had big plans to do all that again, but he came early.
When we brought the baby home each time the exact same thing happened: we were too dang tired to CARE about anything but sleep. It didn't matter whether the windows were washed or not. The laundry piled up faster than it ever did before and in mere days you couldn't tell I'd gotten every last piece washed & put away before the baby came. In fact, Aaron didn't even have a room for his first 7 months (and neither does Lauren for that matter) and in the long run we were much happier the 2nd & 3rd times around because we just didn't pressure ourselves to be perfect.
I also know that it doesn't matter that I'm saying this because people said it to me too. I still wanted everything perfect. But that's my first tip... don't try to be perfect because nothing ever is.
2. Make your wishes known before everyone is already at the hospital.
If you want to be alone (just husband, wife, baby and medical staff) for delivery, you need to express those wishes before you are in labor. It is the only way to save hurt feelers. And it is totally your prerogative to be alone in labor and delivery. I'm not sure if anyone told you yet, but labor and delivery is NOT pretty. It isn't fun. It is actually pretty gross and very exhausting. Just know that, before you invite a whole party into the room. And nobody in that room with you will ever look at you the same way once they've seen you birth a child.
3. Plan on being tired for a year at least. (I don't actually know how long it is before you get real rest because by the time Ian was sleeping well enough to afford us a decent night's sleep, we already had another baby.) You'll do best if you learn to exist in a happy way while you are completely exhausted.
4. Grow a thick skin. Stat.
You can't unhear things. And people say MEAN stuff. There is always someone who will think how you're parenting is awful. There will always be people who don't have any filter at all and will feel no qualms about telling you you're wrong. It's best to start growing your thick skin now... and march to the beat of your own drum. And just do what feels right for you. Brush everything else off your shoulders and move on. You can't please everyone all the time.
5. Let people do things for you.
As soon as someone offers something, accept it. This goes for letting someone vacuum your house, bring you meals, etc. This also goes for the hospital. Let the nurses change the diapers. You're going to change 3000 some diapers (per kid) in your time as parents so you might as well let someone else do it whenever you get the chance!
I'll admit this is a really hard one for me. I don't like letting people do things for me. And with breastfeeding it is really difficult to let someone care for the baby while I do something like...sleep. (Doesn't matter anyway, if any of the kids is awake, I am too. Even if I had soundproof walls in my bedroom it wouldn't matter.) But I'm trying to let more people do more things for me. I'm a work in progress.
I'm going to put the kids down for naps and come back to this hopefully. I think I've hit all the major things...
Sleep, Precious Sleep
In the last month or so, I've been asked several times how Roger & I regularly manage to get all three children sleeping at the same time. I decided that, while I'm certainly no expert, I could blog about it.
It is no secret that our kids haven't always been good sleepers. In fact, they sucked at sleeping.
But it seems that we've stumbled upon a method to get all of our children down for naps and bed at the same time, most of the time.
First, we do not abide by the old adage, "Never wake a sleeping baby." Well, actually it depends on your definition of "baby." Beyond the newborn stage, we do not abide. Why not? In order to get all the kids sleeping at relatively the same time, they need to be tired at the same time. If Lauren falls asleep at 11am, that's fine, but if she sleeps longer than 20 minutes she won't be ready for an afternoon nap. So...I wake her. I don't startle her awake or abruptly wake her, but I do make an environment that makes it more difficult for her to sleep. (Read: I put her down.) Same story in the afternoons... We never let the boys sleep past 4:30pm. If we do, they won't go to bed before 10pm and that makes for a tired morning.
Second, we do the same routine every afternoon before nap and every night before bed.
Around 12pm, we have lunch. Then we watch a show and drink milk. Around 1pm, I take one of the boys (usually Aaron) to his bedroom, read a story or two, give kisses, and into his bed. Then I do the same for the other boy. Then I nurse Lauren until she's sleeping and she goes to her bed. Then...I don't make ANY noise. Yeah, yeah, yeah, your kids "should get used to sleeping through noise." Nope. Not in this house. My kids are incredibly light sleepers. If I want them to sleep, I don't make noise.
For bedtime, we do a bath most nights, the jammies, a show while eating a snack & drinking milk, do medicines (for Aaron), brush teeth, read stories, give kisses, into bed. Sometimes Roger does it all himself at bedtime (awesome to have daddy be so great at bedtimes & very useful too.) It really is a good idea to have more than one person able to do bedtime with your kids... you know, in case you have to stay overnight in the hospital or something...
We are by no means perfect. And our kids had to Cry-it-Out eventually, but this is what is working for us now!
Stay tuned, though, because we are about to move Ian and Aaron together and most likely will have to make some changes.
It is no secret that our kids haven't always been good sleepers. In fact, they sucked at sleeping.
But it seems that we've stumbled upon a method to get all of our children down for naps and bed at the same time, most of the time.
First, we do not abide by the old adage, "Never wake a sleeping baby." Well, actually it depends on your definition of "baby." Beyond the newborn stage, we do not abide. Why not? In order to get all the kids sleeping at relatively the same time, they need to be tired at the same time. If Lauren falls asleep at 11am, that's fine, but if she sleeps longer than 20 minutes she won't be ready for an afternoon nap. So...I wake her. I don't startle her awake or abruptly wake her, but I do make an environment that makes it more difficult for her to sleep. (Read: I put her down.) Same story in the afternoons... We never let the boys sleep past 4:30pm. If we do, they won't go to bed before 10pm and that makes for a tired morning.
Second, we do the same routine every afternoon before nap and every night before bed.
Around 12pm, we have lunch. Then we watch a show and drink milk. Around 1pm, I take one of the boys (usually Aaron) to his bedroom, read a story or two, give kisses, and into his bed. Then I do the same for the other boy. Then I nurse Lauren until she's sleeping and she goes to her bed. Then...I don't make ANY noise. Yeah, yeah, yeah, your kids "should get used to sleeping through noise." Nope. Not in this house. My kids are incredibly light sleepers. If I want them to sleep, I don't make noise.
For bedtime, we do a bath most nights, the jammies, a show while eating a snack & drinking milk, do medicines (for Aaron), brush teeth, read stories, give kisses, into bed. Sometimes Roger does it all himself at bedtime (awesome to have daddy be so great at bedtimes & very useful too.) It really is a good idea to have more than one person able to do bedtime with your kids... you know, in case you have to stay overnight in the hospital or something...
We are by no means perfect. And our kids had to Cry-it-Out eventually, but this is what is working for us now!
Stay tuned, though, because we are about to move Ian and Aaron together and most likely will have to make some changes.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
My Kids are Fresh Food Snobs.
I didn't really think too much about it when it happened, but a couple of days ago my mom and I were at the grocery store and the following conversation happened:
Mom: "Do you need fruit? DelMonte canned fruit is 10 for $10 this week."
Me: "Nobody in my house likes canned fruit, but me."
Mom: "The kids don't eat canned fruit?"
Me: "Nope, they're so used to fresh that they won't eat canned."
Mom: "Huh."
Am I raising food snobs? My children will eat frozen fruits and vegetables. They eat a wide variety of fresh fruits and vegetables... more than any other almost-four-year-old and 2 year old I know. But they won't eat canned anything.
Mom: "Do you need fruit? DelMonte canned fruit is 10 for $10 this week."
Me: "Nobody in my house likes canned fruit, but me."
Mom: "The kids don't eat canned fruit?"
Me: "Nope, they're so used to fresh that they won't eat canned."
Mom: "Huh."
Am I raising food snobs? My children will eat frozen fruits and vegetables. They eat a wide variety of fresh fruits and vegetables... more than any other almost-four-year-old and 2 year old I know. But they won't eat canned anything.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Sunday Sweetheart & Trumpette Socks
We might not get anymore sunshine before Lauren turns 6 months old, so these might just turn into her 6 month photos. (I hope not. Not that I don't like them, but I really hope we have another sunny day before next weekend...)
We took these photos of Lauren wearing her Trumpette socks from her Great Aunt Sam. There's a contest going on Trumpette's Facebook for the most "likes" or comments on a fan photo... so if you want to help Lauren win, you can go to her photo and like it (or comment.)
While we're talking about Trumpette socks, let me just go ahead and say that I love them and if I wasn't so cheap Lauren would have a whole bunch of different kinds of them. She's growing out of her 0-6 month size Trumpette socks and I'm so sad about it! *sigh* We've worn the dickens out of the pairs she got from Great Aunt Sam! PERFECT for dressing up her feet without wearing shoes. We're in the "don't wear shoes unless you have to camp.
So without further rambling, here's dear Lauren in her cutie-patootie socks. (and Carter's outfit from Grandma Spaceship.) Roger took these photos...if you notice, I'm in the background making sure she didn't lose her balance and crack her noodle on the floor. She's getting really good at sitting, but she's not 100% yet. Roger's a much better photographer than I am. He taught himself before he had kids, unlike me who didn't decide to learn to use the camera until I was juggling all these tots and the camera.
We took these photos of Lauren wearing her Trumpette socks from her Great Aunt Sam. There's a contest going on Trumpette's Facebook for the most "likes" or comments on a fan photo... so if you want to help Lauren win, you can go to her photo and like it (or comment.)
While we're talking about Trumpette socks, let me just go ahead and say that I love them and if I wasn't so cheap Lauren would have a whole bunch of different kinds of them. She's growing out of her 0-6 month size Trumpette socks and I'm so sad about it! *sigh* We've worn the dickens out of the pairs she got from Great Aunt Sam! PERFECT for dressing up her feet without wearing shoes. We're in the "don't wear shoes unless you have to camp.
So without further rambling, here's dear Lauren in her cutie-patootie socks. (and Carter's outfit from Grandma Spaceship.) Roger took these photos...if you notice, I'm in the background making sure she didn't lose her balance and crack her noodle on the floor. She's getting really good at sitting, but she's not 100% yet. Roger's a much better photographer than I am. He taught himself before he had kids, unlike me who didn't decide to learn to use the camera until I was juggling all these tots and the camera.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
The Pacifier
I don't really like that my third child sucks on a binky. Neither Ian nor Aaron ever did. No matter how hard I tried, the just wouldn't go for the binky. They didn't suck thumbs either. It was so nice not to have that habit to break.
But sometimes I have no choice, having a preschooler, toddler, and infant, to have the baby suck on a pacifier. At least she will because there would be a lot more screaming than there already is!
Plus, she looks so sweet.
But sometimes I have no choice, having a preschooler, toddler, and infant, to have the baby suck on a pacifier. At least she will because there would be a lot more screaming than there already is!
Plus, she looks so sweet.
 |
| I really did not want to wake her this morning to go pick up brothers from school. |
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Did I mention?
I'm going to try and blog every day of 2011? I already missed the first 2 days so I guess we wait and see how well I do. I had 140 posts in 2010. Shall we just shoot for 200 this year? I think you'll be awfully sick of me if I do 363...
Some things I've been thinking about lately:
A friend I've known for a long time... back to junior high school at least had something tragic happen over the holiday & while I don't know exactly what it was (nor do I feel like I should know) I have been thinking of her and praying for her.
My daughter is going to be 6 months old in January. My husband is going to be 31 on 1/11/11. This is the year I turn 30. My sons are going to be 4 and 3 this year. Insanity.
I probably won't actively wean Lauren, but I think by the end of 2011 I neither be pregnant nor breastfeeding a baby for the first time since 2006. I'm kinda looking forward to it!
Last year I knew 25 (at least) ladies having babies. This year so far, there are 5 ladies in our friends and family who are expecting, the first of those babies due to arrive in February.
I have resolved to eat better, keep a log of everything that goes in my mouth, and hope for weight loss! My pants are tight and I'm ready. My plan is just to log what I eat (keeping myself accountable just by being able to see on paper what goes down the hatch) and do what I do until the weather gets warm enough to get out with the tots and put some miles on the jogging stroller. Then it is time to rock and roll... Mondays & Fridays I'll have the boys in the BoB and Lauren in the Ergo. Tuesdays & Thursdays I'll have Lauren & Aaron in the stroller and Wednesdays I'll have to figure out what to do with just Lauren. Oh that's just until school is out in May, then I have to re-plan.
I have resolved to enjoy my kids more. To be slower to anger. To just take each moment and savor it. To not watch the clock, willing it to move faster to nap & bed times. To just smile, laugh, and be a champion of positive experiences with my children. (For the record, I'm already pretty good a this, but my trouble times are in the morning when we're getting ready to leave and when I don't feel well.)
A post without a photo. I'm sorry!
Some things I've been thinking about lately:
A friend I've known for a long time... back to junior high school at least had something tragic happen over the holiday & while I don't know exactly what it was (nor do I feel like I should know) I have been thinking of her and praying for her.
My daughter is going to be 6 months old in January. My husband is going to be 31 on 1/11/11. This is the year I turn 30. My sons are going to be 4 and 3 this year. Insanity.
I probably won't actively wean Lauren, but I think by the end of 2011 I neither be pregnant nor breastfeeding a baby for the first time since 2006. I'm kinda looking forward to it!
Last year I knew 25 (at least) ladies having babies. This year so far, there are 5 ladies in our friends and family who are expecting, the first of those babies due to arrive in February.
I have resolved to eat better, keep a log of everything that goes in my mouth, and hope for weight loss! My pants are tight and I'm ready. My plan is just to log what I eat (keeping myself accountable just by being able to see on paper what goes down the hatch) and do what I do until the weather gets warm enough to get out with the tots and put some miles on the jogging stroller. Then it is time to rock and roll... Mondays & Fridays I'll have the boys in the BoB and Lauren in the Ergo. Tuesdays & Thursdays I'll have Lauren & Aaron in the stroller and Wednesdays I'll have to figure out what to do with just Lauren. Oh that's just until school is out in May, then I have to re-plan.
I have resolved to enjoy my kids more. To be slower to anger. To just take each moment and savor it. To not watch the clock, willing it to move faster to nap & bed times. To just smile, laugh, and be a champion of positive experiences with my children. (For the record, I'm already pretty good a this, but my trouble times are in the morning when we're getting ready to leave and when I don't feel well.)
A post without a photo. I'm sorry!
Monday, December 27, 2010
Magic Soup
On the downhill slide to four years old, Ian has become much more difficult at the dinner table. Don't get me wrong, I have been blessed with two of the best eaters I have even seen! I believe children all reach a point when eating good food that is good for them is not a fun thing to do...so what's a parent to do? (Take them to Mickey-D's for some nuggets? NO!)
I can't speak for what works in every house, but Roger and I have learned that sometimes getting our kids to eat the food I made for dinner is all about creativity and spin. (and positive attitudes! Trust me, there are lots of nights when all we want to do is yell and give time outs and take away dinner, which always comes back to bite us in the rumps!)
I really should start keeping track of our ideas because nearly all of them are successful tactics for us, we just have to use them sparingly. We've done "dinner winner," where the best eater of dinner gets a special treat like a popsicle or "your choice" from the candy bucket. Or just dessert in general since we don't eat dessert every night. We encourage them to line up their peas on the plate, if that's what makes the peas interesting enough to eat. We may have even discussed how much broccoli you'd have to eat in order to turn green like Luigi. We have a rule (as of a few months ago) that even if you don't want what we are having, you have to eat as many bites as you are old. Most of the time, once the actual eating begins there is no more argument or mention of not liking or wanting dinner.
Tonight, I think was one of my most creative, successful moments yet! (I do say so myself...)
Tonight, we were having Italian Beef Soup for dinner. It's a tomato-beef soup that I made up many moons ago. It's a family favorite. We have it for dinner all.the.time. With the exception of the potatoes, Ian loves it. The potatoes are another story... he doesn't like potatoes in boiled, braised, baked or mashed form, but will eat them as wedges or fries. Eh. Not a battle I care to fight. He doesn't need the potatoes anyway if he's filling up on tomato soup broth and veggies. He'll come around someday.
So anyway, back to tonight. Ian was the first at the table after the dinner bell rang. He even said, "Wahoo!" after I told him what we were having, but as soon as his bowl was placed in front of him he exclaimed, "I don't wan't that! Mommy! Get me peanut butter and jelly!"
Ahem. "First of all, that's not how you ask for something. Second of all, you can have peanut butter and jelly after you eat your 3 bites."
The scoffing continued.
Then he said, "Mommy? How do they make Buzz Lightyear?"
And in my stroke of pure parenting genius (haha) I said what popped into my mind, "Start eating your soup and I'll tell you. It's magic soup. It makes mommy and daddy tell stories."
He picked up his spoon and started eating. As I told him how they make Buzz Lightyears in a silly story, he kept eating. By the time I was done he was done. But he was not finished...
"Mommy? How do they make Barbies?"
"Do you want more magic soup while I tell you?"
"uh-huh!"
Bumpadabum! He ate all of his dinner. And seconds.
Creativity and spin. It's the key to parenting at the dinner table. It also has a lot of other applications when you have 3 under 4...but that's a story for another day.
I can't speak for what works in every house, but Roger and I have learned that sometimes getting our kids to eat the food I made for dinner is all about creativity and spin. (and positive attitudes! Trust me, there are lots of nights when all we want to do is yell and give time outs and take away dinner, which always comes back to bite us in the rumps!)
I really should start keeping track of our ideas because nearly all of them are successful tactics for us, we just have to use them sparingly. We've done "dinner winner," where the best eater of dinner gets a special treat like a popsicle or "your choice" from the candy bucket. Or just dessert in general since we don't eat dessert every night. We encourage them to line up their peas on the plate, if that's what makes the peas interesting enough to eat. We may have even discussed how much broccoli you'd have to eat in order to turn green like Luigi. We have a rule (as of a few months ago) that even if you don't want what we are having, you have to eat as many bites as you are old. Most of the time, once the actual eating begins there is no more argument or mention of not liking or wanting dinner.
Tonight, I think was one of my most creative, successful moments yet! (I do say so myself...)
Tonight, we were having Italian Beef Soup for dinner. It's a tomato-beef soup that I made up many moons ago. It's a family favorite. We have it for dinner all.the.time. With the exception of the potatoes, Ian loves it. The potatoes are another story... he doesn't like potatoes in boiled, braised, baked or mashed form, but will eat them as wedges or fries. Eh. Not a battle I care to fight. He doesn't need the potatoes anyway if he's filling up on tomato soup broth and veggies. He'll come around someday.
So anyway, back to tonight. Ian was the first at the table after the dinner bell rang. He even said, "Wahoo!" after I told him what we were having, but as soon as his bowl was placed in front of him he exclaimed, "I don't wan't that! Mommy! Get me peanut butter and jelly!"
Ahem. "First of all, that's not how you ask for something. Second of all, you can have peanut butter and jelly after you eat your 3 bites."
The scoffing continued.
Then he said, "Mommy? How do they make Buzz Lightyear?"
And in my stroke of pure parenting genius (haha) I said what popped into my mind, "Start eating your soup and I'll tell you. It's magic soup. It makes mommy and daddy tell stories."
He picked up his spoon and started eating. As I told him how they make Buzz Lightyears in a silly story, he kept eating. By the time I was done he was done. But he was not finished...
"Mommy? How do they make Barbies?"
"Do you want more magic soup while I tell you?"
"uh-huh!"
Bumpadabum! He ate all of his dinner. And seconds.
Creativity and spin. It's the key to parenting at the dinner table. It also has a lot of other applications when you have 3 under 4...but that's a story for another day.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Cloth Diapers?
Am I crazy? Perhaps. It's something I always thought I wanted to do, but was afraid. So we're now on the third baby and I still want to do it. So I decided to avoid regret, I should try it.
So today, Little Miss Vandervort is wearing cloth diapers.
And it's cute!
Hopefully it goes well.
What are your favorite kinds of Cloth Diapers? What kind of laundry soap do you use for them? How many do you have? And little tips or tricks you've picked up along the way?
So today, Little Miss Vandervort is wearing cloth diapers.
And it's cute!
Hopefully it goes well.
What are your favorite kinds of Cloth Diapers? What kind of laundry soap do you use for them? How many do you have? And little tips or tricks you've picked up along the way?
Monday, September 27, 2010
Busted Lip. No joke.
So gross. Aaron tripped & fell yesterday, smacked his face off the the driveway at a miniature horse farm up north (Mercer County.) His bottom teeth came very close to all the way through his lip. We took him to the ER in Sharon, PA. It was that bad... Quite a lot of blood & and a huge fat lip, but didn't end up getting stitches. I wonder if it would have been the same outcome if we'd been here in Pittsburgh at Children's...
This morning he woke up really grumpy and fussing that his ear hurt, so off to the pediatrician we went. Turns out Aaron's ear is fine, but his throat is red (strep negative, thank God!) and Aaron's pedi says he probably would have put a stitch in it if he had seen it yesterday, but today it was already healing & there's nothing we can do but wait & make sure it doesn't get infected.
Poor Aaron. I have so much mommy-guilt about his life.
Be Warned: the pictures are graphic & gross. They'll make your knees hurt.
This morning he woke up really grumpy and fussing that his ear hurt, so off to the pediatrician we went. Turns out Aaron's ear is fine, but his throat is red (strep negative, thank God!) and Aaron's pedi says he probably would have put a stitch in it if he had seen it yesterday, but today it was already healing & there's nothing we can do but wait & make sure it doesn't get infected.
Poor Aaron. I have so much mommy-guilt about his life.
Be Warned: the pictures are graphic & gross. They'll make your knees hurt.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Self Portrait & Baby Carriers
I got a Moby Wrap from my girlfriends when Aaron was teeny. I love it. Best. Carrier. Ever. You might also see me in a Maya Ring Sling, an Ergo Carrier, a Peanut Shell, Patapum, or even the Evenflo Hiking Backpack. They all serve very specific purposes in my mothering and child wearing. But I'll never tell you otherwise, the Moby is my favorite of all of them.
**Just so you know, I only paid full price for one of these! The rest were either gifts or hand-me-downs. That's part of the beauty of baby carriers... they are good for multiple babies and/or sharing!
**Just so you know, I only paid full price for one of these! The rest were either gifts or hand-me-downs. That's part of the beauty of baby carriers... they are good for multiple babies and/or sharing!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Someone Asked *ME* for Sleep Advice
LOL LOL.
First of all, to think that someone would ask ME for advice on toddler sleep makes me both smile and roll my eyes. (to myself) If she ONLY knew.
Obviously she doesn't know me well and totally missed my first two babies' sleep issues. So what she sees is me, with my newborn in the moby wrap, my two well-rested sons playing on the playground, using good manners, etc. And then she hears my 3 year old come and ask to go home because he is tired. Then she hears me say that we have to go as soon as Lauren is done nursing so we can get home to have lunch and take naps.
She turns and says, "How on earth do you get them all to take naps?!"
So I gave her the short answer about the same routine every day. (We get up, eat, play, go out of the house for errands or to play, come home, eat lunch, have milk and tv time, go read a story in the bedroom and lay down for naps.) And that was not satisfactory.
She wanted the full Monty about how I got them to sleep while they were still toddlers that nursed. How did I get them to sleep all night? To go to sleep on their own? To let someone other than me put them to bed? To *gasp* have my husband attend to them at night.
And I had to admit that I had to sleep train them using the graduated extinction method of Cry It Out.
As usual, I was expecting a disgusted, annoyed look on her face. Why? Because even though most moms I know have had to let their babies cry about sleep, it still seems to have a bit of a stigma. I know, back in my just-Ian-days, I used to think moms who practiced CIO were torturing their children. ("Wasn't there another way?!")
Instead of the disgusted look, she smiled and said, "and it worked?"
I said, "And it worked. And continues to work. And now both of my young boys go to sleep on their own and sleep all night long. They both lay down in their beds for their naps and most always take a 2 hour nap."
Unsatisfied, she pressed me harder about HOW I did it.
And why I thought it worked...
So I told her that as my children get older and I get more seasoned as a mother, I've come to think that hardly any children just simply lay down and go to sleep without being taught how to do it. I waited so long with Ian because I didn't want him to cry about it that I regretted it when we finally did it...regretted that we didn't do it sooner. Remember? We tried EVERYTHING to get Ian to sleep without crying about it.
With Aaron I waited and waited because he was sick so much I didn't want another ounce of crying or hard times for him. (Read about Aaron's CIO here and here)
I'm sure I'll wait with Lauren for one reason or another.
But ultimately, I know it is coming this time and I've accepted that the graduated extinction method of crying it out is not torture. It doesn't mean you don't love your child. It doesn't mean their cries don't rip you to shreds when you hear them. It doesn't mean you have given up on tender love and care. It means you need sleep and you're willing to endure a few hard nights to get it. It means you have decided that sleeping better is better for everyone in the house and that you know there are better nights ahead.
She just looked at me as I was going on and on... justifying it. I don't know why I feel I have to justify it. I guess because I still know how I felt before I had experienced the sleepless nights and exhausted days and the process of sleep training and the success.
So why am I still justifying it? Just in case someone reads this who needs to hear it is ok to let your baby cry a little bit when the goal is better sleep for everyone.
First of all, to think that someone would ask ME for advice on toddler sleep makes me both smile and roll my eyes. (to myself) If she ONLY knew.
Obviously she doesn't know me well and totally missed my first two babies' sleep issues. So what she sees is me, with my newborn in the moby wrap, my two well-rested sons playing on the playground, using good manners, etc. And then she hears my 3 year old come and ask to go home because he is tired. Then she hears me say that we have to go as soon as Lauren is done nursing so we can get home to have lunch and take naps.
She turns and says, "How on earth do you get them all to take naps?!"
So I gave her the short answer about the same routine every day. (We get up, eat, play, go out of the house for errands or to play, come home, eat lunch, have milk and tv time, go read a story in the bedroom and lay down for naps.) And that was not satisfactory.
She wanted the full Monty about how I got them to sleep while they were still toddlers that nursed. How did I get them to sleep all night? To go to sleep on their own? To let someone other than me put them to bed? To *gasp* have my husband attend to them at night.
And I had to admit that I had to sleep train them using the graduated extinction method of Cry It Out.
As usual, I was expecting a disgusted, annoyed look on her face. Why? Because even though most moms I know have had to let their babies cry about sleep, it still seems to have a bit of a stigma. I know, back in my just-Ian-days, I used to think moms who practiced CIO were torturing their children. ("Wasn't there another way?!")
Instead of the disgusted look, she smiled and said, "and it worked?"
I said, "And it worked. And continues to work. And now both of my young boys go to sleep on their own and sleep all night long. They both lay down in their beds for their naps and most always take a 2 hour nap."
Unsatisfied, she pressed me harder about HOW I did it.
And why I thought it worked...
So I told her that as my children get older and I get more seasoned as a mother, I've come to think that hardly any children just simply lay down and go to sleep without being taught how to do it. I waited so long with Ian because I didn't want him to cry about it that I regretted it when we finally did it...regretted that we didn't do it sooner. Remember? We tried EVERYTHING to get Ian to sleep without crying about it.
With Aaron I waited and waited because he was sick so much I didn't want another ounce of crying or hard times for him. (Read about Aaron's CIO here and here)
I'm sure I'll wait with Lauren for one reason or another.
But ultimately, I know it is coming this time and I've accepted that the graduated extinction method of crying it out is not torture. It doesn't mean you don't love your child. It doesn't mean their cries don't rip you to shreds when you hear them. It doesn't mean you have given up on tender love and care. It means you need sleep and you're willing to endure a few hard nights to get it. It means you have decided that sleeping better is better for everyone in the house and that you know there are better nights ahead.
She just looked at me as I was going on and on... justifying it. I don't know why I feel I have to justify it. I guess because I still know how I felt before I had experienced the sleepless nights and exhausted days and the process of sleep training and the success.
So why am I still justifying it? Just in case someone reads this who needs to hear it is ok to let your baby cry a little bit when the goal is better sleep for everyone.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Day 5 of 21 is more than half over!
 |
| Ian and Lauren on August 14th |
The "experts" say it takes 21 days to form a new habit. We are currently trying to change Ian's poop and pee habits. We are on day 5 of 21.
Ian had a poop accident at the playground this morning, but before and after he's done fine. He didn't even pee in his pants at the same time as the poopcident, so that's good. I think we really are making progress.
Ian hasn't worn diapers except at night since last Wednesday.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
August 14, 2010
So far today Ian has peed in his pants twice. And in the potty not at all. :-( He hasn't worn diapers at all since Wednesday except at night, but he's also just peeing in his pants. How long is this going to go on? We're not going back to daytime diapers so I guess we just deal with the peepeepants for awhile. Ian also moves too fast for the camera right now. Almost all the pictures we take of him are blurry.
*edit* Since I posted this an hour ago Ian has pooped and peed in his potty. *sigh* The ups and downs. And the Hershey Kisses. I've started giving him a hershey kiss after each poop/big pee before he gets a chance to ask for a prize... potty training sucks.
Aaron is being cute, but also learning some of his brother's naughty tricks.
Lauren hates her car seat. And looks adorable in this little romper.
*edit* Since I posted this an hour ago Ian has pooped and peed in his potty. *sigh* The ups and downs. And the Hershey Kisses. I've started giving him a hershey kiss after each poop/big pee before he gets a chance to ask for a prize... potty training sucks.
Aaron is being cute, but also learning some of his brother's naughty tricks.
Lauren hates her car seat. And looks adorable in this little romper.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Potty Talk (II)
Remember last March? When Ian was daytime potty trained?
I never updated again. Perhaps because I was so annoyed and frustrated by the situation.
Just after I wrote that post, Ian got a stomach bug and had diarrhea. No, it isn't a pretty subject, but in order to understand where we stand today, you have to know. He got sick and didn't want to wear underpants. We couldn't blame him. It was dis-gust-ing to have a just-barely-potty-trained 3 year old, who struggles to successfully get his pants off in time to sit on the potty, have diarrhea. I'm sure you're getting the idea. It was a mess. To say the least.
So Ian was asking to wear diapers again and we let him... we didn't want to be cleaning up that mess either.
But after he started feeling better, he decided he was not going in the potty any more. He just refused. And the one thing we've learned from others' experience is the bigger an issue you make of it and the more you "force" them, the harder it is to train in the long run. So we didn't force him. And he was back to wearing diapers full time.
It wasn't really a problem until yesterday. We happened into Ian's old school (because he's signed up at a different preschool this year... because he wasn't potty trained) to sign Aaron up for Kids Day Out. Miss Kelly, the preschool director, said, "oh how funny that you're here! I was just about to call you. There's a spot for Ian this fall for preschool."
Dun dun dunnnnnnnnnn.
Ian *has* to be potty trained to go to preschool there. (You don't have to be PT'd to go to Kids Day Out, you do have to be PT'd to go to preschool.) They kick kids out for not being potty trained. That's why a spot has opened up for Ian.
So now the crunch is on. Can we get him to do it? Can we get him to CHOOSE to go in the potty so he can go to school at the place he loves (& is already familiar with and is SO convenient for ME?!)
If you could pray for Ian and his potty situation, we'd really appreciate it. Ian knows how to go in the potty and how to not pee/poop his underpants. He was fully daytime trained just a few months ago. He is being defiant and stubborn about using the potty. We need that to change. We need him to choose to go on the potty... for good.
I never updated again. Perhaps because I was so annoyed and frustrated by the situation.
Just after I wrote that post, Ian got a stomach bug and had diarrhea. No, it isn't a pretty subject, but in order to understand where we stand today, you have to know. He got sick and didn't want to wear underpants. We couldn't blame him. It was dis-gust-ing to have a just-barely-potty-trained 3 year old, who struggles to successfully get his pants off in time to sit on the potty, have diarrhea. I'm sure you're getting the idea. It was a mess. To say the least.
So Ian was asking to wear diapers again and we let him... we didn't want to be cleaning up that mess either.
But after he started feeling better, he decided he was not going in the potty any more. He just refused. And the one thing we've learned from others' experience is the bigger an issue you make of it and the more you "force" them, the harder it is to train in the long run. So we didn't force him. And he was back to wearing diapers full time.
It wasn't really a problem until yesterday. We happened into Ian's old school (because he's signed up at a different preschool this year... because he wasn't potty trained) to sign Aaron up for Kids Day Out. Miss Kelly, the preschool director, said, "oh how funny that you're here! I was just about to call you. There's a spot for Ian this fall for preschool."
Dun dun dunnnnnnnnnn.
Ian *has* to be potty trained to go to preschool there. (You don't have to be PT'd to go to Kids Day Out, you do have to be PT'd to go to preschool.) They kick kids out for not being potty trained. That's why a spot has opened up for Ian.
So now the crunch is on. Can we get him to do it? Can we get him to CHOOSE to go in the potty so he can go to school at the place he loves (& is already familiar with and is SO convenient for ME?!)
If you could pray for Ian and his potty situation, we'd really appreciate it. Ian knows how to go in the potty and how to not pee/poop his underpants. He was fully daytime trained just a few months ago. He is being defiant and stubborn about using the potty. We need that to change. We need him to choose to go on the potty... for good.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
The McDonald's Happy Meal
***WARNING! You might get offended by this post. I really go off about parenting and forming children's eating habits.***
CSPI Threatens Suit over Happy Meal Toys
What do you think?
As I said publicly a little bit ago, I believe it is NOT McDonald's fault that kids are "getting fat" from eating Happy Meals. Yes, of course the food could be healthier in the Happy Meals and yes, McNuggets could have just chicken and breading instead of 45 ingredients (eew... it's true, though, Google it.), but is it seriously McDonald's fault that our kids are eating it so much?
Nobody really seems to care that Disney does the same damn thing with their marketing and when you go to Disney World, look at the kids meals! They are pizza, nuggets, hot dogs, with fries (or apples/carrots), pop to drink, etc. If you looked at the ingredients in the meals, I'm sure it isn't any better than McD's. Oh then there's the special desserts that sometimes come with sit-down restaurant meals, the "bottomless" fries at Red Robin (and the balloons, and the *gasp* ROBIN). Other fast food restaurants have toys too... How is it any different?
I think it is nearly 100% the parents' fault their child is eating McDonalds "too much" or "so much" that it is negatively affecting the child's diet. I mean, you CAN go ahead and drive past. Your child might cry. Your child might scream at you and throw a huge friggin' tantrum, kicking the back of your seat and making your ear drums bleed. Oh well. By the time you get home and cook him some real dinner, he'll probably be over his tantrum... and maybe he'll have even worked up a real appetite for something delicious, nutritious, and homemade.
I'll never lie to you about Team V eating at McDonald's. We do. I do buy Happy Meals for my kids... occasionally.
I mean, maybe twice a month? Maybe once a week in the winter time when we go to the indoor playground just to get out of the house and make some friends? And if you count the indoor playgrounds at Burger King and Chick Fil-A, we eat at fast food places about 3 times a month. If we're traveling, maybe a little more than that.
Fast food is convenient and for the most part, it tastes good. Of course the kids love it. (Except... they don't love it. Unless my boys are starving, they eat way better at home than they do at fast food places...)
Why do we go then... other than the playground?
They love the toy in the Happy Meal. It's almost always a really cute something-or-other from a movie that they've seen or have seen commercials for and they play with those stinkin' toys endlessly!
They eat the food because it is there and I say they can't open the toy or play in the playground until they have eaten it. If it was up to them, they would play/open the toy and leave the food to rot in the little cardboard carton. Because I don't want to "waste my money" I tell them THEY HAVE TO EAT IT.
So whose fault is it? Is it McDonald's fault? Is it MY fault? Could I avoid the entire situation just by not going there? Of course I could! And would my children know any different if we didn't go there? Of course not! Would they continue to ask me to stop at "Donnie's" on our way past? Probably... Would they eventually stop having tantrums about me not stopping? I think so. Would I save money in the long run by cooking our meals at home and buying the occasional toy from toy aisle at the store? I bet!
In our lives, McDonald's Happy Meals are special treats that we occasionally get. Ian would never ask for dinner at McDonald's. That's just not how we do things around here. And if you asked him, "hey Ian, what's for lunch?" He'd tell you: soup, a sandwich, or perhaps a hot dog... and in saying it, he'd mean "at home" not "out." McDonald's is only on his mind if we happen to be passing one, or if I bring it up.
I like it that way.
I'm going to be really pissed if they take the toys out of the Happy Meals. I think that's un-American.
So now, after I re-read this, I realize I didn't really address the "real problem" that is pushing this lawsuit. The perceived problem of kids eating too much McDonald's and forming bad eating habits because of it. I still don't think it's the Happy Meal Toy's fault! How can it be? If your child is eating at McDonald's meals every day or several times a week or enough that they are getting fat from it, you need to reexamine what is really going on in your life!
Are you balancing your child's "junk food" intake with exercise opportunities? More importantly, are you feeding them chicken nuggets at home because that is all they will eat without having a tantrum? Do your children eat so many snacks that they're not hungry for the dinner you cooked? Do you cook "fast food" meals at home because that is all you think you have time for?
Did you know that it can take up to 70 times of introducing a food to your child before he will even taste it? Did you realize that means that you have to introduce new foods to your children in order for them to have an expanded palate? If you only feed your children McNuggets because "that is all they will eat" you are missing the boat on feeding your children.
I know, I've only been a mom for 3 years, and perhaps I've had it easy with my kids and their eating, but maybe it's because we've never allowed our children to "get away" with only eating the "good stuff" on their plates and leaving behind the veggies, fruits, meats, etc. (PS- I'm a total hypocrite. I'm an incredibly picky eater and my children definitely eat a more balanced diet than I do. Should I blame my parents?) I also know that there are just some things that some kids won't eat. It happens. Keep trying. Aside from potty training, it's probably the most frustrating thing that parents deal with...
Anyway, back to McDonald's Happy Meal toys...
It says in the article I posted up above:
I guess we could look at it this way... if you go and order the healthiest one (which I am assuming is a Hamburger, Apple Dippers, and White Milk, but I don't know that for sure) at least you're introducing your child to APPLES and you are getting them to drink white milk and you can use the toy as a bribe! If there isn't a toy anymore... you can't even do that.
If you made it this far, thanks for sticking it out... and sorry if I offended you. Sometimes it really is our fault, though, and we need own it. And try to change.
CSPI Threatens Suit over Happy Meal Toys
What do you think?
As I said publicly a little bit ago, I believe it is NOT McDonald's fault that kids are "getting fat" from eating Happy Meals. Yes, of course the food could be healthier in the Happy Meals and yes, McNuggets could have just chicken and breading instead of 45 ingredients (eew... it's true, though, Google it.), but is it seriously McDonald's fault that our kids are eating it so much?
Nobody really seems to care that Disney does the same damn thing with their marketing and when you go to Disney World, look at the kids meals! They are pizza, nuggets, hot dogs, with fries (or apples/carrots), pop to drink, etc. If you looked at the ingredients in the meals, I'm sure it isn't any better than McD's. Oh then there's the special desserts that sometimes come with sit-down restaurant meals, the "bottomless" fries at Red Robin (and the balloons, and the *gasp* ROBIN). Other fast food restaurants have toys too... How is it any different?
I think it is nearly 100% the parents' fault their child is eating McDonalds "too much" or "so much" that it is negatively affecting the child's diet. I mean, you CAN go ahead and drive past. Your child might cry. Your child might scream at you and throw a huge friggin' tantrum, kicking the back of your seat and making your ear drums bleed. Oh well. By the time you get home and cook him some real dinner, he'll probably be over his tantrum... and maybe he'll have even worked up a real appetite for something delicious, nutritious, and homemade.
I'll never lie to you about Team V eating at McDonald's. We do. I do buy Happy Meals for my kids... occasionally.
I mean, maybe twice a month? Maybe once a week in the winter time when we go to the indoor playground just to get out of the house and make some friends? And if you count the indoor playgrounds at Burger King and Chick Fil-A, we eat at fast food places about 3 times a month. If we're traveling, maybe a little more than that.
Fast food is convenient and for the most part, it tastes good. Of course the kids love it. (Except... they don't love it. Unless my boys are starving, they eat way better at home than they do at fast food places...)
Why do we go then... other than the playground?
They love the toy in the Happy Meal. It's almost always a really cute something-or-other from a movie that they've seen or have seen commercials for and they play with those stinkin' toys endlessly!
They eat the food because it is there and I say they can't open the toy or play in the playground until they have eaten it. If it was up to them, they would play/open the toy and leave the food to rot in the little cardboard carton. Because I don't want to "waste my money" I tell them THEY HAVE TO EAT IT.
So whose fault is it? Is it McDonald's fault? Is it MY fault? Could I avoid the entire situation just by not going there? Of course I could! And would my children know any different if we didn't go there? Of course not! Would they continue to ask me to stop at "Donnie's" on our way past? Probably... Would they eventually stop having tantrums about me not stopping? I think so. Would I save money in the long run by cooking our meals at home and buying the occasional toy from toy aisle at the store? I bet!
In our lives, McDonald's Happy Meals are special treats that we occasionally get. Ian would never ask for dinner at McDonald's. That's just not how we do things around here. And if you asked him, "hey Ian, what's for lunch?" He'd tell you: soup, a sandwich, or perhaps a hot dog... and in saying it, he'd mean "at home" not "out." McDonald's is only on his mind if we happen to be passing one, or if I bring it up.
I like it that way.
I'm going to be really pissed if they take the toys out of the Happy Meals. I think that's un-American.
So now, after I re-read this, I realize I didn't really address the "real problem" that is pushing this lawsuit. The perceived problem of kids eating too much McDonald's and forming bad eating habits because of it. I still don't think it's the Happy Meal Toy's fault! How can it be? If your child is eating at McDonald's meals every day or several times a week or enough that they are getting fat from it, you need to reexamine what is really going on in your life!
Are you balancing your child's "junk food" intake with exercise opportunities? More importantly, are you feeding them chicken nuggets at home because that is all they will eat without having a tantrum? Do your children eat so many snacks that they're not hungry for the dinner you cooked? Do you cook "fast food" meals at home because that is all you think you have time for?
Did you know that it can take up to 70 times of introducing a food to your child before he will even taste it? Did you realize that means that you have to introduce new foods to your children in order for them to have an expanded palate? If you only feed your children McNuggets because "that is all they will eat" you are missing the boat on feeding your children.
I know, I've only been a mom for 3 years, and perhaps I've had it easy with my kids and their eating, but maybe it's because we've never allowed our children to "get away" with only eating the "good stuff" on their plates and leaving behind the veggies, fruits, meats, etc. (PS- I'm a total hypocrite. I'm an incredibly picky eater and my children definitely eat a more balanced diet than I do. Should I blame my parents?) I also know that there are just some things that some kids won't eat. It happens. Keep trying. Aside from potty training, it's probably the most frustrating thing that parents deal with...
Anyway, back to McDonald's Happy Meal toys...
It says in the article I posted up above:
McDonald's does use the healthier Apple Dippers in its advertising, the CSPI attorney acknowledged but once the customer actually gets to McDonald's, the apple side is almost always replaced--by default--with nutritionally inferior fries, unless the customer specifically asks for it. It's rarely, if ever, offered at the counter, he said.I think that places the blame SQUARELY on the parents, not on the Happy Meal, right? You know they have apples, so order them. And do like I do...take the caramel sauce out before you hand over the meal and toss it right in the garbage. Ian doesn't even know there IS caramel sauce for dipping. You're letting your child form a really bad eating habit. Just because McDonald's isn't stopping you doesn't mean they are to blame for your kid eating the caramel sauce!
Anyway, Apple Dippers are only relatively healthier, Cronin added, and send kids a mixed message: apples are only good if they're paired up with sugary caramel. Ultimately, he said, "They're forming really bad eating habits. Their healthiest meal still isn't good for you."
I guess we could look at it this way... if you go and order the healthiest one (which I am assuming is a Hamburger, Apple Dippers, and White Milk, but I don't know that for sure) at least you're introducing your child to APPLES and you are getting them to drink white milk and you can use the toy as a bribe! If there isn't a toy anymore... you can't even do that.
If you made it this far, thanks for sticking it out... and sorry if I offended you. Sometimes it really is our fault, though, and we need own it. And try to change.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Attitude Adjustment
I just about LOST IT with Ian a few min ago... he's so tired and really just needed to lay down and take a nap. I'm so tired and not feeling well and really just need him to take a nap. (So I can take one myself.)
Aaron wasn't asleep yet either, so I finally yelled at Ian and told him to go lay down in his room and have an attitude adjustment.
He did go to his room (and slammed the door) and I just stopped in to check on him after putting Aaron in his bed.
He was laying in his bed in the dark, all covered up. He said, "mommy, lay down, I hafta tell you sumpin'."
So I went to his bed and he said, "Mommy. I think you're a really good boy. I'm so proud of you. I love you."
MELT MY HEART!
Now, granted, this is very similar to the interlude Roger had with him last night at bedtime (and it must've melted Roger, too... which is why he told me about it. And Roger's version included something about a bumblebee...) But still!
He listened! He went to his room, he had his attitude adjustment! After he said that, I said, "Ian, I love YOU very much. You're my special boy and I'm so proud of YOU!" and he said, "Ok mommy, go take a nap now."
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Can I Rant for Like 5 Seconds?
If you're one of "those" parents that I'm about to rant about, you'll probably get mad at what I'm about to say. I guess I don't care because if you are one of those parents, you need a little tough love right now.
Today after picking up Ian from his last day of school for the summer, I heard a little girl pitching a huge fit in the parking lot. It caught my attention because tantrums, no matter who is throwing them, usually do. I looked up and noticed a dad a couple spaces away having an epic battle with his 3 year old daughter. (How do I know she is 3? Because the only people at school today were 3 year olds.) I have never seen him before, although I have seen the girl in Ian's class. I quickly decided she was not being kidnapped because while she was screaming she was also calling him daddy and yelling about "my seat." It was an obvious parent-child battle over getting in the car seat.
After strapping both of my own children in their seats, I thought about going to ask if I could help in any way (he had a younger boy with him too), but I decided to mind my own business and hope for the best for that poor dad. I hopped in my seat, put the key in the ignition and looked out the front window.
And I saw him push her into the back seat of the car, slam the door, hop into HIS seat, and drive away!
He looked my way as he was driving out and shrugged his shoulders at me. My mouth was hanging open. I'm sure it was pretty obvious I was aghast at what he was doing. I'm sure he didn't really care what I thought. I sure hope they got home ok.
And this is where my RANT begins. (I know, begins? I thought I said I was only going to rant for 5 seconds...)
Dear Dad of the Screaming Preschooler,
YOU ARE THE DAD. YOU ARE IN CHARGE. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHILD'S SAFTEY. YOU CANNOT LET A TANTRUM GET IN THE WAY OF STRAPPING YOUR CHILD INTO HER CAR SEAT! You just let her win. You just gave her ALL the ammunition she needs for the NEXT epic battle that ensues between parent and child. You just broke the law. You just taught her it was ok to ride in the car without being in a car seat. You just did something REALLY bad.
I know, I know, 20 years ago they hardly even had car seats and kids weren't required by law to be in a car seat while riding in the car. But times have changed, my friend, and for a reason.
So next time, please, grow a backbone and put your 3 year old in her damn car seat. Push her in, hold her down with your elbow while you buckle the straps. Use a little force. You are a 180 lb grown man, she is a 30 pound child. You have the strength and ability to out-muscle her. So what if she is yelling! Kids yell! They scream and they scratch and try to bite, and kick their little legs. Yep, you might get kicked in the face, but you know what? Riding in the car seat is non-negotiable and it is a battle YOU must win.
I'm big on picking my battles. I believe there are many instances where it makes more sense to pick my battle and redirect instead of give a time-out or a spank. I'd never argue with you on that point. It's part of parenting.
Riding in a car seat is a battle I will (and do regularly) fight every time. Why? Because when it comes to the safety of my beloved children, I am NEVER going to let them win and put themselves into danger. I really do not care if I have to break a sweat in the 90 degree parking lot while getting kicked and punched while other parents are watching my child go demonic on me over getting in the car seat. He will ride strapped safely in, he will stop screaming eventually, he will not win that battle.
That is all.
I hope that anyone who reads this isn't one of "those" parents. And if you are and you're mad at me now because I called you out on that terrible decision, I hope you think about me next time you have to force your child into her car seat and then, after thinking about me, I hope you just take the bull by the horns and get 'er done.
Today after picking up Ian from his last day of school for the summer, I heard a little girl pitching a huge fit in the parking lot. It caught my attention because tantrums, no matter who is throwing them, usually do. I looked up and noticed a dad a couple spaces away having an epic battle with his 3 year old daughter. (How do I know she is 3? Because the only people at school today were 3 year olds.) I have never seen him before, although I have seen the girl in Ian's class. I quickly decided she was not being kidnapped because while she was screaming she was also calling him daddy and yelling about "my seat." It was an obvious parent-child battle over getting in the car seat.
After strapping both of my own children in their seats, I thought about going to ask if I could help in any way (he had a younger boy with him too), but I decided to mind my own business and hope for the best for that poor dad. I hopped in my seat, put the key in the ignition and looked out the front window.
And I saw him push her into the back seat of the car, slam the door, hop into HIS seat, and drive away!
He looked my way as he was driving out and shrugged his shoulders at me. My mouth was hanging open. I'm sure it was pretty obvious I was aghast at what he was doing. I'm sure he didn't really care what I thought. I sure hope they got home ok.
And this is where my RANT begins. (I know, begins? I thought I said I was only going to rant for 5 seconds...)
Dear Dad of the Screaming Preschooler,
YOU ARE THE DAD. YOU ARE IN CHARGE. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHILD'S SAFTEY. YOU CANNOT LET A TANTRUM GET IN THE WAY OF STRAPPING YOUR CHILD INTO HER CAR SEAT! You just let her win. You just gave her ALL the ammunition she needs for the NEXT epic battle that ensues between parent and child. You just broke the law. You just taught her it was ok to ride in the car without being in a car seat. You just did something REALLY bad.
I know, I know, 20 years ago they hardly even had car seats and kids weren't required by law to be in a car seat while riding in the car. But times have changed, my friend, and for a reason.
So next time, please, grow a backbone and put your 3 year old in her damn car seat. Push her in, hold her down with your elbow while you buckle the straps. Use a little force. You are a 180 lb grown man, she is a 30 pound child. You have the strength and ability to out-muscle her. So what if she is yelling! Kids yell! They scream and they scratch and try to bite, and kick their little legs. Yep, you might get kicked in the face, but you know what? Riding in the car seat is non-negotiable and it is a battle YOU must win.
I'm big on picking my battles. I believe there are many instances where it makes more sense to pick my battle and redirect instead of give a time-out or a spank. I'd never argue with you on that point. It's part of parenting.
Riding in a car seat is a battle I will (and do regularly) fight every time. Why? Because when it comes to the safety of my beloved children, I am NEVER going to let them win and put themselves into danger. I really do not care if I have to break a sweat in the 90 degree parking lot while getting kicked and punched while other parents are watching my child go demonic on me over getting in the car seat. He will ride strapped safely in, he will stop screaming eventually, he will not win that battle.
That is all.
I hope that anyone who reads this isn't one of "those" parents. And if you are and you're mad at me now because I called you out on that terrible decision, I hope you think about me next time you have to force your child into her car seat and then, after thinking about me, I hope you just take the bull by the horns and get 'er done.
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